Everybody has had or seen somebody have one of those days that “isn’t their day.” When somebody tells you “it isn’t their day,” you can tell by how they talk and carry themselves.
Their actions result from low confidence levels, and the tone of voice, speech mannerisms, and body language of somebody having a bad day are all just signs of their confidence levels.
As confidence levels play a role on bad days, they also do the reverse and play a role on good days.
Due to its ever-presence, you must learn what confidence is and how to develop it to your advantage.
Learning and developing confidence will lead to portraying more confidence externally also internally, both of which are important.
First, we must start by looking at what is confidence and why it matters.
What Confidence Is and Why Does It Matter?
Confidence is a feeling or consciousness of one’s powers or reliance on one’s circumstances.
Another way to describe confidence is a faith or belief that one will act right, properly, or justly.
For example, when you are confident that somebody can get a job done, you believe in their abilities to carry out the task effectively and efficiently.
Confidence levels typically result from parenting, life experiences, and trauma.
While some people are naturally confident, most people put in work to become more confident in themselves and their abilities. The good thing about confidence is that it can develop over time.
A way people can develop confidence is through accomplishments in life, whether that be personally or professionally.
The reason that confidence matters in everybody’s day-to-day life is that by being confident, you can put yourself and others at ease.
When you are confident in yourself and your abilities, people look at you as more credible and able to execute.
Unfortunately, confidence doesn’t pertain to all areas of life. You may be confident in your ability to do one thing but not as confident in your ability to do another.
For example,
You may be confident in the work you do but not confident in investing the money that comes from your work.
Since there are different types of confidence, it is helpful to know at least a few to better understand.
Key Takeaways
Confidence is a feeling or consciousness of one’s powers or of reliance on one’s circumstances.
Confidence levels typically result from parenting, life experiences, and trauma.
When you are confident in yourself and abilities, people look at you as more credible and able to execute.
Types of Confidence
When considering different types of confidence, you must consider both the good and not-so-good.
While being confident is a good thing, too much confidence can be a bad thing.
Below we will look at four types of confidence; the first two are good, and the last two are not.
Avoid the second two types at all costs.
Self-Confidence
Self-confidence is the belief in yourself and your abilities as a person.
It allows you to control your life and the outcomes that unfold in your life.
In addition to controlling the outcomes in your life, it can aid in your ability to control the results of certain situations.
For example,
Negotiating with other people, and having high self-confidence will show through your tone of voice and assertiveness.
Self-confidence is the main driver for getting what you want from the deal.
Self-Efficacy
Self-efficacy is the belief in your abilities to succeed in a particular area or field.
Examples of areas that involve self-efficacy can be:
Relationships,
Work,
and School.
While self-confidence and self-efficacy are commonly used interchangeably, the two terms differ.
Think of self-confidence as your macro-confidence. You can believe in yourself and be successful in life.
Think of self-efficacy as your micro-confidence. It is your confidence in being successful in an area.
Raising your self-efficacy in multiple areas of life will increase your self-confidence.
Overconfidence
Overconfidence occurs when your belief in your ability exceeds reality.
It stems from humans wanting to believe that we are good at everything and don’t want to face that there are certain things we aren’t good at.
For example,
Somebody repeatedly claims they are the best at a task when, in reality, they aren’t any better than anybody else who is doing it.
When you’re overconfident, it can lead to embarrassment and negative emotions if you are unable to prove it to yourself.
Arrogance
Arrogance is having an inflated self-image and overestimating one’s self and capabilities.
Being arrogant is a very unattractive characteristic you must avoid at all costs.
Arrogant people are typically quick to overlook the negatives about themselves and only bolster the positives and all they can do. This results from a lack of self-awareness.
If somebody is unaware of their weaknesses, then all they can do is focus on the positives.
Although we only touched on four types of confidence, other types should be investigated and studied.
Now that we know what confidence is and why it matters, along with different types of confidence, we must turn inward and learn how to improve confidence.
Key Takeaways
When considering different types of confidence, you must consider both the good and not-so-good.
While being confident is a good thing, too much confidence can be a bad thing.
Think of self-confidence as your macro-confidence. It is your ability to believe in yourself and be successful in life. Think of self-efficacy as your micro-confidence. It is your confidence in being successful in an area.
How to Improve Confidence
Learning about confidence and the types is one thing, but becoming more confident requires self-work and patience.
To start, one way to become more confident daily is to raise your emotional intelligence levels.
High emotional intelligence levels allow you to identify and perceive any emotions you feel on a day-to-day basis and manage them. By controlling your emotions, you can approach life more confidently and at ease, knowing you are in control.
Below, we will dive into a few more tips and tricks to help improve confidence.
Exercise
When you exercise, your body releases endorphins that help you to feel good.
On top of this, by exercising, you are working on improving your self-image, which naturally translates to more confidence.
When you can look in a mirror and happily accept how you look, this will help you carry yourself in life and any endeavors you take part in.
For example,
If you aren’t happy with your weight and you start to lose weight, you will feel great about yourself and the work that you have put in.
These feelings will translate into how you carry yourself around others and the self-talk that you are engaging in.
You will come to realize that with meaningful action, anything is possible. Realizing this gives you a positive outlook on life and any goals you are trying to accomplish.
Be Present and Aware
To be present and aware is to know your surroundings and the situation at hand.
Being present and aware allows you to put more energy and focus into a task.
If your mind is elsewhere than where you currently are, you will lose confidence in your current situation.
For example,
You are in a morning meeting or class and start thinking about what to eat for lunch.
If you get asked for input on the current conversation, chances are that you will rush to collect your thoughts to come up with an answer on the fly.
When replying, you will not have much thought and confidence behind your answer compared to if you were paying attention.
At the same time, other people in the room can tell you aren’t confident in your input due to the speech mannerisms and body language that come with rushed answers.
When in a group collaboration, such as a team meeting or talking with people out at a bar, engage in active listening and understand what the other person is saying.
Doing this allows you to be present and aware of what is said so you confidently engage in the conversation and add value.
When by yourself, such as doing homework or working on a business, understand what the task is at hand and what needs to get done.
Becoming present and aware of what you are working to achieve lets you map out how to complete the task. When you know what steps you are taking, you are much more confident in executing them.
Visualize Confidence
When you can visualize confidence, it allows your mind to see what that looks like to you.
Visualization gives the mind an image of how a confident person would act in a given situation or in general.
When you have an idea of how you should be acting or steps you should be taking to develop and portray confidence, this alone will give you the confidence to take action and keep moving forward.
Engage in Positive Self-Talk
Although there is the ego, the negative voice in your mind that wants to be hard on you, focus on being your supporter and engage in positive self-talk.
When engaging in positive self-talk, you reaffirm that you are enough and can make it through anything.
When you allow the negative commentary to overtake the positive self-talk, you start losing confidence and experience a myriad of other emotions.
Take the time to listen to the self-talk that constantly plays through your head. Is it positive? Is it negative?
If it is negative, find the root cause or source and work to change your mindset surrounding it.
Fix Your Posture
Posture can play a role in the self-confidence that you feel and project.
It not only sends messages to your brain on how confident you are feeling but also sends messages to others on how confident you are feeling.
When you hunch over or sit low in your seat, you portray low engagement and self-confidence, no matter how comfortable it may be.
People who sit up straight tend to be actively engaged in what is happening.
Sitting upward straight allows you to focus and pay more attention, thus increasing your confidence to contribute and react to the situation.
Next time you sit, focus on sitting upward straight and not hunching over. You will portray confidence to others along with having more energy and power.
Immerse Yourself
If you want to be more confident in an area of your life, immerse yourself in knowledge and experiences involving that area.
By doing this, you are forcing yourself to become confident since you have no other choice.
For example,
You may be confident in your ability to perform a task, such as fixing a car, but not as confident in talking to people.
You can fix this by immersing yourself in the area you want to become confident in and learning from others.
If you want to become better at talking to people, you need to put yourself out there in social settings.
When in these social settings, study the basis and flow of conversations you partake in. Studying and observing will allow you the ability to reply and build on topics logically and effectively.
Over time, you will become more confident in your ability to talk with others and carry on a conversation.
The situation above translates into many other areas depending on where more confidence is needed.
Key Takeaways
Learning about confidence and the types is one thing, but becoming more confident requires self-work and patience.
Being present and aware allows you to put more energy and focus into a task.
If you want to be more confident in an area of your life, immerse yourself in knowledge and experiences involving that area.
Conclusion
We have gone over what confidence is and why it matters, different types of confidence, and how to improve confidence.
Although this is only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to confidence, you now have a basic understanding and how to improve it in your personal and social life.
Since there is little middle ground between being confident and not, study and work towards becoming more confident.
You never know; one day a friend may let you know it “isn’t their day,” and you will be able to tell them why it is their day and help increase their confidence.
But first, it all starts with you and your confidence.
–Your future self will thank you.
