Saying no. It seems so simple, yet many of us struggle to say it. But why do many of us struggle to say no? Is it guilt?
The act of saying no is a power within itself, and there are three reasons why you need to learn how to say no.
Whether you struggle to say no or not, these three reasons will help you discover the power behind saying no and give you the confidence to say it.
1. Set Boundaries
When you learn to say no, you are learning to set boundaries. If you remember the last time you said no, you will realize that a boundary formed when you said it.
When this boundary forms, it signals to the other person(s) that you will not partake in their request. They may try to persuade you, but they should ultimately respect your decision.
If the other person(s) doesn’t respect your boundaries, such as continuously repeating their request, you will need to say no again in a firm tone and cease the discussion.
When you constantly allow others to overstep your boundaries, you are viewed as weak-minded and will be taken advantage of.
Instead of being taken advantage of, learn to say no and set boundaries. If somebody is not respecting your boundaries, have a conversation with them. If they continue to do so, think twice about being around them.
2. More Time for Yourself
An issue with always saying yes is that most yes’s involve your time. When you learn to say no, you have more time for yourself.
By consistently being a “yes-man,” your personal needs may go unmet at the expense of helping others.
For example,
A co-worker wants you to pick them up and drop them off after work daily, which adds 30 minutes to your route. While it started as a one-time thing, they hate taking the bus and ask if you can do it daily. If you are to pick them up daily, you will not be able to eat breakfast in the morning.
In the above example, this takes away 30 minutes of your time daily, which will start to add up in the long run. On top of this, you cannot eat breakfast in the morning, causing you to be hungry throughout the day.
Instead, recommend to the co-worker that you give them a ride one day a week, and they take the bus the other four days.
While saying no may be uncomfortable, it will allow you more time for yourself and your needs.
Ultimately, saying yes too often will come with the cost of your time. Although you don’t always have to say no, it is wise to have a healthy balance between saying yes and no.
When you harness the power of saying no, you will find the time needed for yourself.
3. Earn Respect From Others
Lastly, learning to say no is guaranteed to earn respect from others. You, your opinion(s), and your time are not respected if you agree to everything and are always available.
When you agree to everything, people won’t have a chance to respect your opinion(s) since you won’t have one. Even if you have one, it will be the same as everybody else’s, which people will place less emphasis on.
Saying no or disagreeing and presenting your opinion allows others to hear you and what you say. While it may not be what people want to hear, they will respect you and your differing opinion(s).
On the other hand, when you are always available, people know they can reach you or meet up with you whenever, so they put less emphasis on you as a person and your time. People are much more likely to respect others if spending time with that individual is uncommon.
To ensure you earn respect from others, think about how often you are available to them and if they deserve the availability you are giving them. While particular individuals in our lives deserve access to us at any moment, others knowingly take advantage of this availability.
Instead of always saying yes, do the opposite and say no. You must show that your opinion(s) are valid and your time is limited to earn the respect from others that you deserve.
Key Takeaways
Instead of being taken advantage of, learn to say no and set boundaries. If somebody is not respecting your boundaries, have a conversation with them. If they continue to do so, think twice about being around them.
Ultimately, saying yes too often will come with the cost of your time. Although you don’t always have to say no, it is wise to have a healthy balance between saying yes and no.
Lastly, learning to say no is guaranteed to earn respect from others. You, your opinion(s), and your time are not respected if you agree to everything and are always available.
Conclusion
It is the norm to be agreeable and go with the flow nowadays.
While saying no can be difficult and uncomfortable, it can be beneficial when used correctly.
Instead of always saying yes, learn to say no and watch yourself set boundaries, have more time for yourself, and earn respect from others.
The power behind the word no goes far beyond what we reviewed in this article, and although many struggle to say it, learn to go against the grain and say no.
–Your future self will thank you.